1.  28 days before my 32nd birthday I had a hysterectomy.

2.  I had been through so much after my second son I was glad to have it done.  

3.  I spent 2 years trying to feel normal and being pain free before I agreed to give up my uterus even though I knew we were not having anymore children.  

4.  Point of the top three facts….at 35 I still get asked if I will try for a girl.  

5.  Why do people always assume we want more or want what we don’t have? 

6.  I am good with my two boys.  Chances are if we were able to have another kiddo I would get baby boy #3 and there is way too much energy in my house as it is.  

7.  I had to work talk to my husband for over a year to get him to agree to have a second child. 

8.  As a military family I felt a sibling was important.  With our oldest having a Bilateral Cleft Lip and palate my husband was worried our new little one would feel left out or neglected.  

9. At 11 & 8 neither one of our children feel this way.  We make sure to make time for them both and prep the little guy just as much as the big guy for surgery and what are plans are surrounding surgery. 

10.  Being a parent of two children keeps me very busy but I wouldn’t change a single minute of it.  

11.  I am so glad my boys have each other.  There are so many times where I can see that one day they will have each others back.  They will support each other and stand by each other and it makes me feel so happy.  

12.  Being a parent is tough.  Having two kids keeps me busy enough that I am super impressed by single parents and parents who have more than two children.  

13.  I am a parent who believes extra curricular activities  like sports, music and art are important but that every second of my boys lives does not and should not be scheduled.  

14.  I love days where we can all just relax….on a side note my husband doesn’t sit still for long so often relaxing means going on a hike which we all really enjoy together :) 

15.  As a parent I try hard to know what my kids are doing and how things are going always and I feel lucky and privileged that my kids are still talking and sharing things with me.  I hope it continues. 

16.  I read somewhere that if you listen to your kids and respond to them when they are talking what seems to be nonsense in their younger years then when they are older they will remember you always really listening to what they had to say and hearing what they were trying to tell you ( for example a long drawn out explanation about the fire drill and how exciting it was meaning they had a good day and learned new things).

17. ….it makes sense to me so I try to really hear what they are saying to me even when their descriptions are taking a long time and we should be heading out the door to our next event :)

18. It is nice to know there are parents out there who are in the same boat.  Parents who have kids that behave almost everywhere else but have tantrums at home, parents who lose their mind some days because they don’t know what to do or how to change the bad behaviors they are seeing….parents who know (like I do) that the behavior they are trying to correct in their children is something that was learned from them….(yup queen of the tantrums when I was 8 too :)

19.  It is hard to change behaviors that are so ingrained in your person.  It can be done if you work hard enough.

20.  I hope someday my kids will have all of the best things that make up both myself and my husband and only a few of the bad things….I also hope that any of the “bad” things they may have are the minor qualities we share.  I hope as a parent I teach my boys to be kind and caring as well as being able to look out for themselves.

So far this week I have had an IPOD start playing Boom Boom Pow during meeting…a child who can’t control himself and his silliness …a child hit another with his Yogurt and a third who can’t stop talking about how often he farts…if he is farting, when he farts how his farts smell but mostly how he farts while he sleeps.  :) two of them have gone to the office.. :( …this has been the worst of my week which I have to say has actually been really a wonderful week.  

The teacher I am working for has a silent classroom when she is there…not because she is mean but because it provides a better working environment   Students can ask questions or for help but they don’t need to often.  In our third day together we are almost back to that point.  

I participated in my first fire drill as a sub…I have to say they were awesome!!!!  In reality although we have has some subbing bumps…which is totally normal I have had an amazing week that is progressively getting better and better!  I am also learning a lot about myself as a teacher and that is a good thing.  I have to say I feel pretty proud that there are periods in the day when the classroom is exactly like their teacher has it…that is a good feeling to know they can work and be silent for a sub the way they are for their teacher!

Ok need some help….my little one (8) is the king of tantrums lately…I know part of it is that his dad is in and out so much and he thrives on routine….much more than the oldest. When changes happen I try to prepare him get him ready but lately nothing helps ..we are off to pick up my husband and again (third time in a row) tantrums strikes…he doesn’t know what.to bring to do….partly my fault…they lost video games because they were.fighting but that is a rule if they can’t get along they lose video game privileges….my question….when your kiddo throws a tantrum what do you do…no judging here just looking for good solid ways to stop this from happening…I am at my wits end.

I am terrible at keeping things a secret. I get it from my mom she would always want to give gifts early, we would play guessing games to figure them out. Often she would be so excited she would just give it to us. I have a hard time not doing this with my guys…(husband included) I love it when I find or do things I know they are going to love!

Tomorrow morning at 10 I told the boys we have to goto the airport to pick up one of their friends grandma because their friend has a basketball and his family can’t do both…I told them instead of her waiting we are going to give her a ride.
We are picking up my husband. They have no idea Dad is coming home to spend their vacation week with them. I have almost blown it twice tonight with random comments I have caught and covered up. I am pretty sure they don’t know. I cannot wait to see their sweet faces when they see him!
He does have to go back and we are not sure yet for how long…it is looking like the end of march but it is always subject to change. I am looking forward to the week :)

Tomorrow is my first full day of Subbing. I am looking forward to it :-) I get to work with the same great class and I don’t have playground duty :-) it makes me nervous to be responsible for so many kiddos on the play ground (bus duty make me nervous too but less than injured or “escaping” children :-) ….looks like tomorrow will be rainy so in door recess it will be ….I am really looking forward to seeing these kiddos again. I have two jobs this week and 5 in the month of October I think I could get used to this job :-)

So the boys did great this week.  My little one is taking the bus for the first time this year…we live just far enough LOL …which isn’t actually far enough in my opinion but when we move next summer he will have to take a longer bus ride to school so my goal was to make the bus not so scary ;)  He had a great week at school as the week progressed he had fewer meltdowns and did great! He gets stressed when there is too much change…this week his Dad started a 5-6 month TDY to San Diego, he went to a new much bigger school and started riding the bus….and Mom is not “working” at his school twice a week this year.  Overall he has handled this very well. 

My oldest started Junior High….he has many more responsibilities….like writing his homework down…which he didn’t do for math on Friday and then freaked out because he couldn’t remember it when he went to do it today…so I told him to do what he thought he was supposed to and call a friend from class to double check…he started the friend called back and he was right…I wish he would be more confident in what he knows…he is so my child.  I wish this wasn’t a trait I had shared with him.  Some days I have little confidence in what I know …and honestly what I know would scare many people cause I know crazy things some days.  So does he.  He is my fact kid…he holds information in his brain like nobody I know (okay like me and his Dad does it too).  He has had homework every night this week plus this weekend which he has never had to do before….he is getting up an hour earlier and walking to and from school with a back pack that is huge and stuffed with homework :(…I wish he would bike because it would be fas

Both boys started soccer this week…practice once a week and games on Sat..I could lose my mind by the end of soccer season… :(  I am all over town and didn’t get to see the little guy play today..I have some great friends here who are helping me out but it still makes me sad that I miss it. 

Today has been crazy.  My husband headed out on Sat for San Diego.  I miss him tons when he is gone.  He takes on as much as I let him and some days that is almost everything, today was one day I would have loved for him to be here.  It was a crazy clean and get ready for school day.  The boys did their rooms and got laundry together for me to wash which I did.  I woke up sore from yesterdays workout and didn’t want to do yoga today..but I did and I am more sore but still moving forward.  After my workout I swept and mopped all of our floors…smells like wood cleaner in the house….love it.  The boys played outside like it was the last day of summer… ;) They were running crazy and enjoying it all day.  We got everything together and organized for tomorrow (most things were done that could have been in advance).

 My little one is riding the bus for the very first time tomorrow.  He is nervous…wants me to drive to school after him to make sure he can find his class ;) .. I am okay making sure the four blocks he has to go he has made it safely ;)

My oldest is starting Junior high tomorrow…6th grade I am not sure when this happened.  One of those moments you wonder when you blinked.  Seems like yesterday I was putting him on the bus to kindergarten ;).  He is excited for something new and very nervous about the change ..normal and I keep reminding him if he can’t remember where to go in the morning I am sure there will be a line at the office window of kids looking for classrooms.  There is no way he would let me go in with him! …maybe…maybe he would.  He is sweet enough. 

Little guy went to sleep quickly guess he wore himself out running with the dog and riding his scooter around the yard.  My oldest he was down here 10 min ago.  I hope he falls asleep soon he has to be up at 6:45 to get ready and he hasn’t had to get up that early in two years. 

Now me …I am going to do something crazy….because the boys haven’t had to get up early in two years… neither have I but tomorrow I am going to get up at 5:20 to do my workout at 5:30 before the boys get up and see how I feel…see if I can make that work.  This means I will be hopping in the shower while my oldest gets dressed for school.  Which hopefully means that we can have breakfast together and talk before he goes.  Take the traditional before school picture and see him off….possibly drive him because the first day of school is also a band day and that alto sax is HEAVY!  I am not however waking up the little guy…so the older one might have to hoof it.  By 7:30 I am sure the little guy will be up.  He usually is…but who knows. 

I am nervous for us all.  This year along with both boys going to new schools, bigger schools with the same kids…but new routines and my husband being in San Diego for the first half of the school year….maybe longer I decided to sub …so I am also starting something new this year.  Some days I am terrified …some times super excited.  I am also in my last semester of college…second time around….second shot but I completed it this time!  I graduate in December with a BA In American History and a concentration in Public History.  I am using my subbing experience to decide if I want teach.  Which is what I went 2 and a half years for the first time around and stopped because I felt I wasn’t getting a good education and didn’t like that I was getting A’s but not learning anything I felt I should be….I was a pretty intense 21 year old ;) LOL.  

Starting tomorrow all new things for us…and all with out my husband here for a bit another change…we will get to see him..short visits in between and we will go there for the December break so I can’t complain much.  I know I am lucky he is safe ;) .  

Okay so ….Little guy is doing okay.  He went to camp yesterday and they told me if he needed me or got sore they would call me to come get him.  We only have cell phones and apparently here in Maine anything outside your town is long distance…so my cell number being of a diff town was long distance and  the nurse being very much older (80s prob) did not realize the busy signal was because she needed a code not because my line was busy for an hour….and she didn’t ask anyone for help so my child who by the way fell on his wrist while playing and made it hurt ..(his words) sat with ice for an hour while his friends played.  It broke my heart to hear.  Now that being said……she did get a hold of my husband’s work cell but “didn’t want to bother him” so she didn’t leave a message.  If she had left a message he would have called me and told me to go get him!!!!  He is in SD and was in a meeting…no message means no call back in his book cause it wasn’t important or it was a wrong #.  I left that camp in tears…wrote the coordinator a long email and told them my boys would not be there today because the trust I put in them was broken yesterday…if I am not comfortable with them going there and I don’t feel safe then it is not a good place for them to be…they didn’t try either one of my emergency contacts either!!!!  They also did not check with my older son to see if there was someone else they could call or to make sure the # was right…nothing. 

:(  The coordinator wants to meet with me to talk.  I will see.  Not in the mood right now,…I think I am too angry.

On a good note …my little one feels pretty good today..hopefully that means it isn’t broken.  Have to help him get a shower…(he is smelly for a little guy LOL) 

And as far as my work outs go…after a week of Vegetarian eating and doing all of my workouts…..  down 3 lbs and 1 1/4 inches. :)  I think that is a good start to my weekend!!

We had a lot of fun today!! The boys are both playing really well and learning so much my oldest struck out once and got two hits as well as scoring the first run for his team.  His coaches are awesome and super supportive and that makes all the difference in the world.  He had confidence handed to him on a plate this season and he took it, uses it and feels great about the game he plays!  The little guy got to play  several different positions the one he was most excited about (and I missed during my time at the other field …oh yes today and Monday they play at exactly the same time) was catcher.  One of the other mom’s snapped a picture for me so I could have that moment.  LOVE this town and the people who are hear.  This has been one of my favorite moves hands down. So they don’t keep score in the little one’s league which makes things interesting…cause you know each team is saying they one….LOL….when will the adults learn that not keeping score doesn’t really help the kids….oh well.   Again the little guy has super supportive positive coaches and he is having a BLAST.  It is nice to have a baseball season that coaches are focused on having fun!  I love that my kids are enjoying it.  I still cannot wait for my husband to get home but today was a great day. :)

As a military wife I know that there are times when we will be apart.  We have been married 13 years and together 17…I am okay with the separation…sometimes honestly it does us good.  Packing day is what I hate…packing day sucks because then the leaving is real.  Now I know I don’t have a single damned thing to complain about ..he will be gone one month and in the U.S. the whole time.  That being said it is tough on all of us when he is gone.  We all miss him and everything about our day changes when he leaves.  It makes us all sad.  Packing day makes me bitchy and moody and that is when I am at my worst. While he is gone I suck it up and push through…I have to, he needs me to, my boys need me to so I do.  Sometimes at night it is too quite…especially here…in VA there were more friends…more support.  You would think being close to family would help but I am so close and yet so far away.  We will see…I guess the true test will be when he spend 5 months on the west coast while we are here.  

Anyway…I know it will all be fine…I know it will FLY by and best of all I know he will be safe.  That is important for all of us.